Misplaced
by BoshiBasher555
Summary: What happens when you cross Pokemon and TF2? You get this, of course. Some cursing is involved, hence the rating. This is geared more towards Team Fortress 2 than Pokemon, so expect 2Fort and Granary, not Pallet Town or Icirrus City.
1. Chapter 1

_Hey readers, it's Boshi here. I got an idea in my head because of all the Pokemon and Team Fortress I've been playing, and this story is the result... at least, it will be when it's finished. I know what you're thinking... "But you haven't finished your other stories yet!" Well, I'm gonna claim writers' block for now. I'm a little burned out on them. Also, I would advise you to play a game of TF2 before reading this, it will help you understand better. Now then, on to the disclaimer..._

Disclaimer: Pokemon is owned by Game Freak, run by Nintendo, and Team Fortress 2 is owned by Valve. I do not claim ownership in any way, and all characters and names belong to their rightful owners. All I own is the computer I'm typing this on, and the idea for the story.

Misplaced Chapter One:

What the Heck is THAT Crap?

2Fort. A simple, yet devious arena for the mercanaries hired by RED and BLU, involving a sewer, a bridge, and two forts. Each has an intelligence room, deep in the bowels of each fort. Each intelligence room has two entrances, and they are not far from each other on the same floor. Each group of mercenaries must defend their own intelligence, while trying to steal their opponents'. The intel contains vital data and blueprints that would destroy the opposing group and wipe their fort off the map if used, for the blueprints and data pertain to large missiles, not yet constructed by neither RED nor BLU's Engineers.

However, this is a time when neither team is fighting, nor defending the intelligence, because the intel rooms are locked behind foot-thick blast doors. They'll be opened again the next day, when the newest intel is received from the Administrators, who never are on the battlefield, yet are always watching...

In the BLU base, Medic, Heavy, Pyro, Demoman- hereafter referred to as "Demo"-, Soldier, Sniper, Scout, and Spy are all asleep in their beds. Engineer is awake, making his rounds to his various sentry guns placed in ideal positions around the fort. One is hidden in an alcove near the Engineer's room, another is placed on the stairs leading down to the sewers, a third is outside the resupply room, and a fourth and fifth are placed inside the intel room and downstairs resupply room. You can never be too careful.

The Engineer is finishing up on the fifth and last sentry gun outside the resupply room upstairs, when he hears a loud thud that came from near the back of the base- from outside the intel room.

"Aw shit, what is it now?" he said to himself. Probably Heavy or Scout got up and wanted a snack or something. Then again, that darn RED Spy has destroyed his sentries during the night before, so it would be prudent to check to see what made the noise. The Engineer sighed, lamenting the loss of a few extra minutes sleep, and stepped over to the doorway and peered outside.

Something was climbing the stairs toward the intel room- but it was much too small for even a Spy to disguise as. It was having difficulty on each step, and bumping against the wall every now and again. The Engineer decided it wasn't a threat, but he wanted this over and done before he went back to sleep. He crept over behind the thing on the steps to get a better look.

Although there wasn't much light, he could tell it was a pale green, had a single horn on top of its head with a blunted tip, stood about a foot and a half tall, and its tail looked like a dunce cap with the point turned inside out, and fixed onto the creature's behind at the bend. The open part of the tail looked ragged and had triangular sections missing. All in all, it looked somewhat reptilian.

The creature stopped for a break on the seventh or eighth stair, and the Enginner stepped back into the darkness, so he wouldn't be noticed. He noticed that its eyes had red irises, and... was it wearing guyliner? Maybe it was just part of its skin. Its stomach had a banded brownish-yellow diamond on it, and it had no fingers or toes- but on each foot there was a protective-looking cover for the tip, almost like a toenail, but solid.

There was no way this little guy was harmful. The Engineer stepped out into full view and the creature jumped in surprise and uttered a squeak. There was a five-second staring contest, and the creature just sat there. Whether it was in fear, shock, surprise, or any combination of the three, the Engineer did not know. What he did know what that it let him step close and scratch its chin.

In response to this, the creature closed its eyes and smiled in bliss. The Engineer bent down to pick it up, and... failed. He tried again, and this time succeeded in getting it up to the top of the steps.

"Hoo-wee! You sure are HEAVY, li'l feller!" he said. Heavy suddenly appeared, as if from nowhere.

"Leetle Engineer, vhat is problem?... Oh," he said, noticing the strange creature for the first time, "Is leetle creature heavy?"

"Yep," said the Engineer. "He's VERY heavy. Think you can pick him up, son?" the Engineer said.

"Yes, I can." the Heavy said. He bent down... and had no trouble picking the creature up. The creature had apparently fallen asleep during their little chat and was now snoring gently in Heavy's big arms.

"He veighs about half of Sascha." the Heavy said. "About... seventy kilograms, I vould say, Engineer."

The Engineer was stunned at this. This little creature weighed SEVENTY kilos? If he hadn't tried to pick it up himself, he's have called the Heavy a liar.

"Just from lookin' at it, you'd think it weighs only SEVEN kilos..." he said, after a moment of silence, pierced only by the snoring of the creature. "We'll have to find a place to put him until we can figure out what to do with him."

"Indeed," the Heavy said. "Ve shall put him in your room for now, my friend. He is small enough to sleep in a cat basket... don't you have vun of those?"

The Engineer nodded, and they both went back downstairs to the sleeping quarters. Little did they know, the creature would cause some havoc and change around the BLU base...


	2. Breakfast and Meeting the Team

_Greetings, readers! I'm terribly sorry about the delay, I haven't had ANY time to write because of school. Bleh. Anyway, my junior year is officially over now, and I have plenty of time to write in between looking for a job and doing maintenance work around the house- the dishes don't clean themselves, after all._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Team Fortress 2, and I do not own Pokemon. If I owned them I would be absurdly rich. Also, some people actually are making money off the game, thanks to the Steam Workshop. I gotta figure out how to make some neat weapons that could get accepted, so I can get in on a percentage of that cash._

_Last thing I'm gonna say before I start the chapter, is that it will seem a little, well, WEIRD, seeing as I wasn't sure how to word all this. And that long chapter is LONG._

_***Line break***_

Misplaced Chapter Two:

Breakfast Escapades and Meeting the Team

(Inside the BLU Engineer's room, eight hours after the previous night's events, creature's POV)

Mmmm... comfy pillow... wait, pillow?

I crack open my eyes, sit up, and peek around. The first thing I notice is that I'm laying upon a bright red pillow, nearly blood red. Then everything else comes into focus, and nearly EVERYTHING is red. The bottom half of the four walls, the lamp, heck, even the details on the tools lying around haphazardly are red. Why red? I'll have to find out later.

My pillow is located in a wicker basket in the corner of the square room, opposite the door. I hate doors, I can never get them open... Where was I? Oh yes, describing what the room looked like. There is a bed (covered in a red blanket, of course) further along the wall. Currently, it seems to be occupied. I can tell because there's a red and white nightcap sticking up above the blankets, and the owner is snoring away. That must be what woke me up.

Deciding not to investigate the room further until I'd made sure other important things were taken care of, mainly ME, I began my what-used-to-be normal routine of checking myself for injuries, just in case I'd somehow gotten hurt during the night. Let's see... arms are in place, stomach is unmarred, legs seem fine, and my tail and horn are in place. Good. Next order of business...

*gggrmmblblblbl*

Yeah, food. I don't see any dirt next to this fluffy pillow, maybe there's some under the bed over there?

I clamber down from the basket as best I can, and walk over to the bed and peek under. Nope, no dirt here, just more tools. Maybe the guy in the bed knows where to find some food around here? I haul myself out from under the bed and climb up onto the bedspread, and get a look at the man. Wait a second... it's the guy from yesterday! I must have fallen asleep during his talk with the other... big... guy... they must have moved me in here, but I want OUT now, damnit!

I begin my noble quest to escape the room... by poking Mr. Sleepy in the belly to wake him up.

"WAAARGH!" ***THUD***

He sits up so fast, I'm flung back off the bed! Aw snap... that hurt. I still want food, though, so I make my wants known by hauling myself back onto the bed and poking him again.

"Well I'll be... good mornin' little fella. How are ya?"

My stomach rumbles again, letting him know wordlessly of my problem. He starts laughing for no reason whatsoever.

"Well, since I doubt I'll be getting' anymore sleep anytime soon, I guess I'll let ya out to explore. Mess hall's down the hall to the right, second door on the left. Everyone here's gonna be too busy to make ya breakfast if you miss it the first time around, so you might want to wait there if you're too hungry to really explore. If ya feel like goin' back to sleep when you're done eatin', just skedaddle back here and hop back into the basket. I'll leave the door open for ya... Oh yeah, before I forget, my name's Dell, pleased to meet'cha. Everyone else here just calls me Engineer, Engie, or Hardhat."

He'd been saying all this as he got up and got dressed, and now he opened the door and peeked out. As he stepped out the door, Dell said one last thing...

"If ya see a man with a big domed helmet and a nasty-lookin' scowl, that's the Soldier. Stay out of his way until he gets his coffee. Not even your weight will stop him from throwing you out the window."

Dell stepped out the door and was gone, leaving me to my morning business, of which there was nothing to speak of. I pulled the door further open and headed down the hall to the mess.

In the Mess Hall

As I stepped into the room (which was, yet again, blood red), nobody gave me a second glance. Dell must have explained everything in a hurry to the seven other men seated around the table. It must have helped that they were all half-asleep and sipping coffee, except for the man wearing an eyepatch, who was drinking something from a bottle and belching. From the smell of it, it was some sort of alcohol. Don't ask, I'm not telling you how I know the smell of booze. Speaking of smells, there was a tasty smell coming from the kitchen. Mmm... Bacon... Wha? Oh, sorry. Anyway, there were two open seats right next to each other, so I hopped up onto one as Dell slipped into the other.

Before I continue, I'll take a moment to describe the seven men, besides Dell, who were at the table. Directly to my left was a man wearing a large, domed helmet that covered up his eyes, and a look of contentment on his face as he sipped his coffee. He must have been the Soldier that Dell spoke of.

To the Soldier's left and around on the foot of the table, there was a skinny man dressed in a T-shirt and pants that went halfway down his shins, and from there his socks covered his legs and disappeared into his cleats. He also wore some sort of metal tags, and a headset over his odd-looking hat. It was odd-looking because I can't really describe it. He looked like he could race a horse and win, but at the moment he was idly spinning a wooden bat around in his hand.

To the skinny guy's left, there was a man in a strange-looking suit with a mask hanging off of his chair. He had already finished his coffee and was playing with a box of matches, lighting them and letting them burn nearly to his fingertips, then flicking them into his empty mug. He seemed engrossed in what he was doing, and also was the only one giving me strange looks, almost like he wanted to see how easily I would burn.(Here's a hint for you- NOT. AT. ALL.) I gave him a funny look, and he went back to flicking matches.

To the odd man's left, around the next corner of the table, there was the dark-skinned man drinking booze. He wore some sort of tight-fitting sock cap, and he also wore thick body armor for some reason. He also had a mustache and beard. The man had set down his bottle and was now fiddling with a small, spiky ball-shaped device that suddenly blew a puff of smoke into his face, making him cough, and bringing a fit of giggles to the odd man.

To the dark man's left, directly across from me, was a very big man. I recognized him from last night, before I fell asleep. He was as big as a bear, and had muscles to match. He seemed to have a bit of a pork belly starting up, and his head seemed a little small sitting on top of his huge body. He wore fingerless gloves, which were occupied at the moment with cleaning a shotgun.

To the big man's left was an empty seat. The person who sits there must be the one cooking, but the next seat over was occupied by another skinny man, but not as skinny as the man sitting next to the Soldier. He wore one fingerless glove on his right hand, a leather vest over his shirt, and pointed boots. His hat looked like it had seen better days. He also wore glasses and was busy sipping his coffee. I poked Dell and pointed at the guy. He only told me to call him Sniper.

To Sniper's left was another man in a suit, but he looked highly flammable for some reason. He wore a ski mask and gloves. He looked sneaky, and could easily fit into a spy movie, so I'll call him the Spy. The Spy was busy cleaning a weapon that looked like a pistol, but not quite... what was it called again... a revolver, I think. Weapons must be important around here if all these guys are going to be cleaning them at all times of the day.

To the Spy's left was Dell, and to Dell's left was me, so now that we've come full circle, let's get on with my story.

There wasn't much conversation among the men. The quiet seemed almost solemn, and nobody wanted to break it. Eventually, though, all silence must come to an end. A man in a doctor's coat, with black hair, round glasses, medical gloves, and an odd-looking backpack burst into the room with a few plates of food.

"Dell, could you go get ze rest of ze food, please?"

Dell silently nodded and left the room, and returned seconds later with the rest of the food. He and the doctor set the plates on the table, and everyone quickly got a portion of food. Seeing that I couldn't reach anything, Dell got me small portions of everything there. Bacon, eggs, toast, hash browns, and waffles. I didn't really like the waffles much, but I ate them to be polite. As each man finished at their own pace, they picked up their plates, mugs, and utensils, and carried them into what seemed to be the kitchen. I continued watching each of them as they left the room, until only the doctor and I were left. Finally, the doctor spoke.

"Well, little one, I am ze Medic here, and if you are going to stay on ze base, I need to make sure you aren't carrying any nasty diseases that ze touching could spread. Could you hop up onto the table please?"

I complied, and he pulled out what looked like a cannon, with a tube leading from the back end of it into the backpack he was wearing.

"Do not worry, zis will not hurt a bit," he said.

The Medic pulled a switch on the gun, and I suddenly felt warmer, and there was a hissing and crackling around me, as a couple patches of dead skin that had been making my skin itch for days peeled off and poofed into dust. After a few seconds of this, the doctor flicked the switch back and the warmth disappeared. I was a little confused as to what happened, but the Medic was quick to remedy this too.

"Zis is ze medigun prototype that I have been working on for years. I have not yet perfected it, but it can cure many of ze diseases and afflictions, it kills most parasites and harmful bacteria, and gives ze immune system a boost. When it is done, I fully expect it to be able to cure any disease or affliction, up to and including cancer and ze common cold, and be able to kill any harmful virus, bacteria, or pathogen zat invades ze body. It should also be able to remove ze toxins from snake bites, scorpion stings and ze like. Now zhen, since your skin is made of a rock-like substance, I am assuming you eat ze dirt?"

I nodded, and the Medic smiled.

"Well zhen, let's see if we have some dirt for you to eat, we wouldn't want you to have a skin fracture, now would we?"


End file.
